Healthy Relationships

Introduction

We have lots of different relationships. We have friendships, family relationships and intimate partners which can range from a steady relationship to a one-night stand. Most relationships have unwritten rules that keep them ticking over. We usually have expectations about how we should be treated in our relationships, and how we should treat others. For example, you may not continue a friendship with someone who puts you down and makes you feel bad.

Romantic or sexual relationships can sometimes be a bit more complicated.  When you really fall for someone, it can be hard to see the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship.

A healthy relationship involves trust, respect and equality. Some other ingredients of a healthy relationship are:

• Feeling safe and comfortable with your partner
• Valuing each other’s opinions – even if they are different
• Supporting each other’s dreams and ambitions
• Honesty and trust
• Having other interests that don’t involve each other
• Accepting each other’s friends and family
• Making each other laugh
• Only having sexual contact when both people want to
• Accepting each other for who you are

When Is It Hard to Communicate?

It can feel more awkward talking to someone you don’t know; someone you’re attracted to or authority figures like police and doctors.

We sometimes struggle to communicate if we’re worried about being judged by other people, or when we think they might not like what we have to say. It may be harder to communicate when you’re in a group of people instead of one to one.

Our own feelings, and what we think people expect of us, can also get in the way of saying or showing what we really mean. Things like fear or embarrassment can impact on what you do or say. This can be especially true when it comes to talking about sex with a partner.

Low self-esteem and anxiety can also make us less able to tell someone what we really want to say.

Feeling like someone hasn’t understood you properly in the past may also stop you from wanting to communicate with them.

The situation you’re in can affect communication. If it’s loud it can be difficult to understand people, or to be understood. Not feeling comfortable or safe can be a barrier to communication, as can being under the influence of drugs or alcohol.